Paramaribo, Dutch Guyana. October 7, 1947

imagesTQUMEINI

Dearest Betty,

You say, in your last letter, that the gift of my heart frightens and bewilders you, and that perhaps I can help you when I get home.

Honey you wait and see how long you remain frightened and bewildered after I get home. I promise it wont be for long. NOW LETS GET THIS THING STRAIGHT! ONCE AND FOR ALL! I quote:

“You see once I gave my heart and for four years I waited and hoped and believed, and then things happened, waiting. Hoping and believing were over, were things of the past which only fools practiced. I dread waiting and I promised myself that I would never again wait as I waited. I know I am selfish, but that is how it is and must be. Dave, please hurry home.” (Home is in quotes thank God!).

My dear, draw up a chair, or something. NOW YOU JUST LISTEN TO ME FOR A CHANGE! I’M GETTING TIRED OF TELLING YOU THIS OVER AND OVER! WHATS THE MATTER WITH THAT MIND OF YOURS ANYWAY?

To begin with precious, I’m the one who has been waiting for you! If you would not let foolish thoughts run riot within you so much, when you are alone. If you could only wake up to reality, you would realize that you are not even participating in your dreaded, “waiting”. You are merely floating on the surface of synthetic, aerated dreams. If you continue, my love, you will soon lose the capacity for making any decisions of your own.

The waiting, my sweet, is entirely up to you. I am, and have been, ready to offer you permanent shelter in my arms, the patience, knowledge, and understanding that can come only from one who truly and completely loves, as I love you. I offer you my heart, my life, my love, for life, immediately, or whenever you wake up to the fact that all you have been secretly hoping for, I intend giving to you.

I, not you, wait. How long? Just say, ” Dave, I love you! and see how long your dreaded waiting will continue. Betty, my sweet, please! please! wake up! Realize what we can be to each other. Have done with this, “I have been wronged in the past” complex. Right now! Your not the only one to whom it has ever happened. Your mind is so foolishly crowded with the nonsense and doubts of the past, that you fail to recognize the beauty and stability the present is offering you.

“Dave, you have given me much and believe me I could not and would not cheat you. Nothing lasts that is not built upon truth. You say you have given me your heart.”

I say I have! My gosh! I eat it, walk it, sleep it, and mull it over in my mind on watch! I know, and when are you going to start believing me? When I get home, take you in my arms, tell you that I love you with all my heart? When I look into your bewildered, uncomprehending eyes, and say,

“Love, I am your moon, turn your face to my shafts of enlightenment.
Feel the warm, salty breath of my faith.
Hold still whilst I tear the cloak asunder!”

I hope to be home for about two weeks, when I get there. Our sailing date, as yet, is none to definite. See if you can get “Fluffy” to hold off on your vacation so you can take it when I get home. About the third week in November, my best guess at present.

God bless you my love,
and keep you,

Your Dave

P.S. Write again soon.

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